Kerry Pitt is a master of the mess of life, a gentle and challenging healer, a deep listener, and a seer of souls. Her openness in her work to help others learn from her experience is extraordinary. I am delighted to offer a guest post from this master!
Mastering the mess—That’s not something you are used to hearing, is it? Who wants to master anything remotely connected to messiness? Messes in our lives, be they physical or emotional, are the things we want to sweep away, mop up, do “the work” to heal from.
What if I were to tell you “the work” is to master your mess? What does that even mean?
I have spent the majority of my 44 years on this planet working hard to clean up my messes before I would feel that I could truly live fully and be successful at anything. I played the game of when; “I will start that women’s circle when I finish that training, I will start dating again when I lose 40 pounds, I will start my blog when I am a better writer, I will be a better person when I have healed that old wound…”
Fear of Being Human
I was so afraid of being seen as a mess, as human, as anything less than perfect. I didn’t think anyone would want to hire me as a mentor, that anyone would fall in love with me, that anyone would want to read my blog, until I had mastered life. I was so afraid of this messy human-ness that I just waited. I kept taking new trainings, started a new diet that didn’t work, wrote in a journal only to myself. I waited to the point of stagnation. I didn’t DO anything really. I atrophied. I became afraid of life and of living.
It took a medical crisis to shake me out of my clean up stall tactic. My body created such a mess that I could not ignore it any longer. I developed a fistula in my rectum that was a literal manifestation of all that I was holding in, all that I was waiting to be cleaned up before I shared my gifts to the world. I could no longer ignore the fact that my desire to be a cleaned up person was just not who I was meant to be, that my messes would continue to accumulate until I woke up to the obvious. What if I was here to live within the messes of my life and mentor from the mess? What if I spent the time within the mess to find what really lay within them? Because, what lay within my messes were exactly the gifts I had been hoping to master by cleaning my messes up.
Good Teachers Are Messy
I made a decision to spend time digging around in my messes with a spirit of curiosity rather than disgust, with a sense of acceptance that life is messy and that I am here to delve deep into my own depths and comb through the parts of me I was horrified by, to explore those parts of me that I thought for so long needed to go before I could BE the mentor I hoped to be.
And here is what happened, I realized that I need those so
called horrid parts, the parts of me that feel incomplete or un- evolved. The depths of my mess are where I am meant to teach from. I asked myself who I trust most in this world, who I gravitate to as mentors and teachers? The evolved masters? The people who are 20 years out of their recovery? No. I always trust those who show me the reality of their lives, that they have been through it, they continue to go through it, and learn from each mess of their lives. The people who have been my greatest mentors have not been ascended masters, but those who may only be a few steps ahead of me in their own healing. They teach FROM the mess.
And that is what I am here to do. I am here to be the Master of the mess. I am here to help you find your courage to get your hands in the muck of your life and to see what gifts lie there. I am here to shine the light into your messes when you feel you cannot do it alone, to witness you in your glorious mess and to shine the light on the beauty of all of you, mess and all. I am here to help you MASTER YOUR MESS!
Just beautiful, Kerry.